The One Question You Should Ask Every Time You Suffer

Never underestimate the power of asking the right question.

In college, before I switched my major to psychology (which, it turns out, is mostly a useless degree, I must say), I studied mass communications. I dabbled in television, radio, and newspaper. I enjoyed my short-lived gig as a disc jockey on the airwaves and my even-shorter-lived gig appearing on TV. But ah the newspaper—I absolutely loved the print medium. Ink and paper thrilled my soul. In particular, I found tremendous satisfaction in writing human interest stories. I would interview fairly ordinary people who did somewhat extraordinary things—like the time I spoke with a guy who worked for NASA, or the time I chatted with a military officer who served in Iraq, or the ex-NBA player or a future NFL wide receiver. To sit and chat with someone, to get to know him or her deeply, and afterward to be able to craft their story with accuracy, clarity, and charm takes patience—and requires the writer to ask lots of good questions. The right question can make or (if not asked) break a killer story.

The Dilemma of Job

The book of Job reveals our need to ask the right question at the right time. In the opening two chapters, we read of Job’s misery. Job’s health, wealth, and family all get uprooted in a series of calamities. The sorry scene will make you sad. No one has to ask Job, what just happened? Job knows—and he is literally humbled to the dust. His life seems ruined. Everything has fallen apart. His dreams have all but shattered. Job scrapes himself with shard pieces, which only adds to the poetic symbolism. Perhaps you can relate. The what in front of you pains you because it is painful. One misfortune after another has all but crushed you both physically and spiritually. The broken pieces outnumber the things still intact. You could just about cry everyday—and maybe you do. Your misery is real.

The Bible has much to say about human suffering. From Genesis 3 onward we get glimpse after glimpse of a world dampened with distress. Adam and Eve are the first to feel the pain. The patriarchs, especially Jacob’s son Joseph, also find themselves in trouble time and again. Moses is no stranger to suffering and shame. Neither is Samuel nor David nor Solomon. The Old Testament prophets in particular are forced to grapple with the frailty and fallenness of mankind. Jeremiah, as just one example, is aptly named “the weeping prophet,” and for good reason, since he also authored Lamentations. Jeremiah literally wrote the book on suffering. And of course, the Psalter, with its 150 hymns, takes a deep dive into the full range of human experience. Yes, that vast scope of emotions includes gladness—but so much sadness too. Have you read Psalm 88 lately? Boy howdy, talk about a dark psalm to sing!

The Debate of Job

And that’s where the real questions begin. In Job’s case, the so-called comforters arrive on the scene in short order. The three friends offer Job loads of free advice. Their collective counsel includes a mix of condolences, cliches, and critiques. Words fill the air. Each confidant exudes with confidence. Each persists in his own point of view. The conversation continues on and on. But after three full cycles of debate (chapters 3-25), Job hardly feels helped. So then he gets up and states his case one last time (chapters 26-31). But the debate does not end there. A mysterious man named Elihu finally steps forward and offers his own perspective (chapters 32-37).

At first glance, these chapters, which make up the bulk of the book of Job, seem like a waste of words, or at least a war of words. But are these back-and-forth exchanges between Job and his friends a waste? Like, let’s just strike these words from the record and pretend the dialogue didn’t happen—would that have been better? I don’t think so. You see, the introductory chapters of Job ask and answer the question of what?—that is, what happened? The middle chapters, on the other hand, ask and attempt to answer the all-important question of why?—why did these things happen? Why is not a bad question to ask.

I realize, especially as parents, we don’t much care for it when our kids constantly ask why? “Because I said so, that’s why,” we reply. “Now just do what I said.” To be sure, moms and dads possess the parental prerogative to respond in such a curt, matter-of-fact fashion. After all, fathers and mothers stand as the authority figures in their home, which means they have the God-given right to explain or not explain themselves on any number of decisions they make for their children. But that does not mean God’s people cannot or must not ask questions, as though it is evil to inquire why about something.

The Imago Dei Asks Questions

Proverbs 25:2 says, “It is the glory of God to conceal things, but the glory of kings is to search things out.” God created a cosmos that screams with curiosity. Grass is green. The sky is blue. Gold is hidden in the ground. Snow is cold. Summer is hot. The ocean is wet. Saturn has rings. Dogs bark. Spiders make webs. This is the stuff of life. The world shines with wonder. Kids don’t need a science class in order to marvel at Earth’s mysteries. Five senses will do. A halfway-working set of eyes and ears and mouth and a nose make for great exploring of God’s world. It’s as though the Creator said, “I designed an amazing universe. I cloaked it with mystery. Now tag, it’s your turn to go and search it out.” Think of the galaxy as God’s ultimate game of hide-and-seek.

As God’s image bearers—fully grown and mature, not just limited to our childhood years—we were hardwired to explore and discover. The creation mandate of Genesis 1:26-28 (sometimes also called the “cultural” or “dominion” mandate) calls us to harness earth’s resources for God’s glory and the good of the world. This monumental task of stewardship requires God’s people to ask good questions, to really get to know God’s world. King Solomon understood this notion quite well, to the extent that Israel’s third-ever monarch observed even the hierarchy and habits of ants (Prov. 6:6-11). Solomon was a master of the sciences, among other subjects. Indeed it was the king’s glory to “search” these things out. And of course that’s because we are, by default, a “searching out” kind of people. We naturally ask lots of questions—about everything. And this is no less true of our suffering. We want to make sense of our world. Hence we often ask why?

Asking the Right Question

This leads me to my final point. In this world we tend to ask a lot of questions. These inquiries come in different forms. We sometimes ask in terms of what?—as in, what’s the weather outside? Is it sunny or stormy? We want to describe what sort of day it is out there. Or, if someone gets into a car wreck, we want to know what happened?—the extent of the damage. Other times we ask why?—why did this happen? We want to decipher the root cause of the wreck, for example. Was it negligence? Was it the other driver’s fault?

The what and the why questions are helpful to try to answer. It’s good to describe and decipher what’s going on and why. Otherwise, the Holy Spirit may have opted not to inspire those first thirty-seven chapters of the book of Job. But the story does not stop there. In the final chapters of Job (chapters 38-42), we move from the dilemma and debate of Job to the deliverance of Job. But note that Job’s deliverance (or restoration) does not come immediately. It’s time first for some more questions. But this time, it’s not Job’s friends, Elihu, or even Job himself who does the asking. Instead, God comes with his own set of questions. Yet these questions do not focus on the what or why of Job’s sufferings. No, God raises an altogether different question—and it’s the question you should ask every time you suffer.

The most important question is the question of who? Who was there from the very beginning? Who is in charge? Who rules and reigns? The answer of course is none other than God Himself. Out of the whirlwind the Lord speaks. Whether through creation, the cosmos, or even chaos, God rules the world. He reigns as the Alpha and the Omega. He is King over all, and there is none like Him. The God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ is incomparable, peerless, priceless, and in a league and class all by Himself. And the crucified and risen Lord works all things—everything, even the difficult things—for the good of those who love him and are called according to His purpose (Rom. 8:28).

Friend, you may be suffering hard right now. You may be asking lots of questions. Questions are not bad in and of themselves. But at the end of the day, just make sure you ask the right question—who?—the question that matters most, so that your focus and attention are on God and not yourself.

Click here to read my book, Jesus in Beijing: A Missionary Memoir of Christ's Victory in China.